Do You Really MEAN what you say?

You and such and such are "talking"/"getting to know one another"Got things in common you talk all the time everything is going great!Then phrases like"I miss you'"start coming into the picture.
Hmmm. Do You Really Mean that?

First, let me say I appreciate compliments and also a man that can express himself, but I get scared because I feel like these phrases are at times over-used and have lost their true value. I've come to realize just from observation that people don't REALLY think about what they are saying and use very important words/phrases as common vocabulary. And sadly, don't usually mean what they are saying

I used to be the girl who loved the 'idea" of a male saying sweet nothings to me and would just be WIDE open. Sharing all types of info, that quite frankly that individual probably didn't need to know. Going all out my way to try to be this "perfect" girl and then have it all blow up in my face.

 From my experiences I have decided that I WILL NOT allow myself to be vulnerable, so quickly to an individual who  A) Hasn't been in my life that long B) Barely knows me C) I DON'T KNOW THEM!

With that being said if your telling me 'I miss you", I'm not going to be like some other girls who get all giddy and automatically say it in return if I don't mean it and most importantly if I don't know you. UHHH NO! 

Okay you miss me, well WHY do you miss me? What do you miss about me? We haven't shared that many memories yet, or hung out that much, so SIR what exactly do you miss about me? Maybe people should be more specific and say I miss this or that about u. I take " i miss you" very personal and don't think it should be said to any ol body.

Am I wrong to question that?

 Personally when I say I miss a person. Its because that person in one way or another has had an impact on my life. This goes for friends, family or significant others. I miss their presence/personality/smile/thoughts etc. More than often I haven't spoken to/ or seen that person in awhile which ultimately makes me "miss them". If I just met you and we haven't even been on a date yet all we do is text, talk, and tweet - _ -  you' re still very new to me and I refuse to let you have the privilege of seeing me in other aspects in such a short amount of time. But if it does go somewhere and we do get comfortable then my world will be yours.

Folks you have your WHOLE life to get to know someone, don't quickly open yourself up to someone you barely know. Take your time, really think about what you say to someone and make sure you really MEAN it. Something as simple as "i miss you" can mean ALOT to someone especially because that's usually the beginning to deeper feelings being expressed.

 Question what people say! Make sure they can back it up and not just giving you what they think you wanna hear, or what they think is necessary at that point in your "getting to know you- relationship"

Enjoy the beginning stages of a new friendship let it marinate, hang out! laugh! make fun of each other have pillow fights. Just Live in each others presence, once that is set then start showing your vulnerable side, tell them how you feel when you MEAN it. :-)

miss- notice the loss or absence of 

-urs truly

Psssst.

I'm not even going to sit up here and pretend I don't miss you.

Eyes Shout, what the Lips Fear to say.

I cant even front like I don't look at your twitter or fb, hoping to get some type of update on your life.
I even tried to erase ur number knowing i got that shit memorized.
I smile at the thought of ur intelligence.
I LOL about the time when we ..yea...remember that?..that was fun!
I miss how our eyes would have a conversation
I'm crying.
I'm confused.
I hurt.
I scream.
I want.
Why don't you love me like you used to?
What was so wrong?
I don't understand like you think i do.
Just TELL me whats wrong.
.......
its been THIS many days and THAT many hours since we last spoke.
I just want to be apart
I don't want it to end
I'm slowly pulling away from the shore; hope to hear from you before I'm in the middle of the ocean.

Dreamah.

"...even though we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow, I still have a dream."-MLK

This was once just a Dream.

We all have or at least should have aspirations right? and people often mentioned what their "dreams" are. I would NEVER put anyone down for having a goal, like NEVER. But I can say that at times I just don't believe people.  Are you really DREAMING or just sitting around all day  thinking about a whole bunch ideas that pop into your head of what you THINK you want to do. Are you in college studying YOUR DREAM???. I challenge you to experiment with yourself and really search  for what you DREAM  of.

Personally when I put on my blog that I'm a "Dreamah." I mean it in every sense of the word. My dreams haunt me on a daily basis constantly reminding me of what I have been put on this earth to do. And the craziest thing is that I'll have dreams of certain things that I physically don't know how to do yet! Weird right? now let me re-assure you that my Dreams are not Fantasies they are reassurance mechanisms that have been placed in me to confirm that it will come true.

As a little girl I dreamed of dancing before I even took a class!, that picture on my blog is of my FIRST day going to a dance/gymnastics camp. Mind you this is before we left, don't know why I chose that pose of all poses, but clearly it's a dance pose. And even after that summer I didn't take classes again til I was 11. But throughout the years I would see myself dancing and performing in front of millions of people. Mind you, NO ONE in my family is in the arts. No one sings, dances, draw like nothing. And during that time in my life, my dad was making me into an all-star athlete! Playing basketball for the county and school, was running cross-country placed in the top 50 in the state, but my DREAMS were in a whole nother world. I wanted to sing , dance , and act for people, and I knew even back then that, THAT was what I was supposed to be doing...I didn't know HOW to do it yet, but soon enough I was going to stumble upon it.

In 5th grade I had the MOST amazing teacher Mrs. Ardise, and she started a tap club at our school. Now me knowing that deep down in my heart that I wanted to dance I quickly joined! It didn't conflict w/ this whole athlete thing I was doing so I was super excited. So I got into tap and I just adored being a mover and moving to specific counts, I NEVER missed Tap Club!! The next year comes around and I finally get enrolled at a dance studio and started taking Tap/Jazz/ and Ballet, mind you I was still playing basketball. Dance was allllll that I could think about tho! While I slept i DANCED, while i ate i DANCED, on the playground i DANCED! I was a dancing fool and I loved it!! And from there my love for it went triple -platinum! I got on a competitive dance team, went to a Performing Arts High School, and even pursued Dance in College. I thank god for Mrs.Ardise for bringing my inner being out of me, because entertaining people is my destiny I know it would of happened in some other way , but I'm happy it happened the way it did. The CRAZIEST thing is that I actually ran into Mrs.Ardise one day at the mall, on my college break and I was SO excited to tell her I was still pursuing dance, and come to find out SHE WENT TO THE SAME COLLEGE AS ME!!!!See how things come full-circle? Here is this woman who truly introduced me to the world of dance, and she just so happened to graduate from the same university as me, where I studied as a Dance Major.

Cant Stop, Wont Stop

Here we are now, and I've been fortunate enough to have amazing opportunities as a dancer. I'm in the city of where dreams are made of, and I'm pursuing my dream. And currently I'm tackling my other dreams of acting and singing. These two disciplines are so scary to me, because I want to be perfect at them, and I want to be able to TRULY label myself an actress and a singer. So EVERY week I take an hour vocal lesson and 2-hour acting lesson. I'm really proud of myself because they are both things I've dreamed of doing and now here I am learning how to do it! My dream is to be an overall performer, and being able to go into ANY audition and be qualified for the position. I see myself on stage doing things I never thought I could do but only Dreamed of. All I know is when I wake up in the morning and go to sleep at night, I'm dreaming about the same thing, I know my talents will reach people all over the world and I wont stop till everyone knows and sees it.

If you have a dream pursue it. Don't ignore it, b/c its not going to go away. It's what you' re suppose to be doing. Attack it head on, even if its something you haven't been doing your whole life. You can train yourself to do anything. Its all mental --urs truly

Believah.

Just want to share some words of encouragement, not only for anyone who reads this but as a reminder to myself as well.

I'm currently in the business where there is and will ALWAYS be someone telling you NO.
- Your too thick
- Too lightskin
- Too Darkskin
-Too Tall
-Too short
Quite frankly I'm sick to my stomach of the word "too", as a matter of fact I just might DELETE it from my vocabulary. hmph! *sticks tongue out*

With doors being shut on me a consistent basis I had to realize that my biggest fan is  MY DAMN SELF. And I need to always compliment myself atleast ONCE a day. I honestly do this EVERYDAY and this is in the midst of all the horrible things I think of myself; I'm extremely hard on myself and I can honestly say a little too hard at times. #honestyblog. But  I make sure to Pat myself on the back atleast once daily.

If you notice, I sign all my blogs with "Remember -Love your Beautiful Flaws" and I do that because more than anything I want people to know their worth and how unbelievably amazing they are. And to remind myself ;-)

When things dont go my way I have to remember that it just wasnt meant for me. DONT question it! DONT analayze it! DONT beat myself up about it. I encourage you to do the same if you know deep down that you BUST YOUR ASS then know that you will SUCCEED! Its inevitable. I PROMISE myself and I PROMISE you that if you/I dont quit we will be far more successful than we could ever imagine.  I Believe in you and most importantly I believe in ME.

If you havent heard of a man by the name of Joel Olsteen. I HIGHLY suggest you get into him! Below is one of my favorite quotes from him .

"You have to remember that other people dont determine your destiny;God Does. He holds your destiny in the palm of his hand. If you will keep believing, God will not only bring it to pass, but He will do more than you can ask or think.

"Friend, dont let someone else's unbelief keep you from believing. Dont let other people talk you out of your dreams."

 Believe in yourself before you expect it from someone else - Urs truly

Do you believe?;I do.

Thinkah

HIM.
He.
US.
We.
Days.
tomorrow.
Now.
Yesterday.
HURR.
touch.
scent.
eyes.
skin.
empty.
gone.
loss.
lost.
5.
6.
7.
8.
mustard.
cheese.
bleed.
envy.
proud.
sad.
bored.
confused.
unwanted.
hurting.
longing.
lazy.
la,la,la.
act.
me.